Floaters, we all have them and there's no way to predict when you're going to get them next. You just sit down and voila there it is - a floater. Some people get them rarely while others seem biologically predisposed to having them regularly. At times a floater can be just the grossest and at others, a work of art. A really good floater makes the creator proud, despite the lack of personal recognition.

Floaters of course are those entertaining e-mails of stories, jokes, riddles and trivia that seem to float all over the Internet. We generally don't know the origin of the floater but we appreciate receiving them and love passing them along to trusted friends and family.

Bathroom Reading will bring the best floaters to your bathroom every day on The Daily Reader. If you happen to have a really solid floater (and we know you will), be sure to submit it to the janitorial staff of the Daily Reader. If we choose your floater for publication, you will earn and honorable mention and forever go down in bathroom history for your contribution to the literary arts.

So next time you have a floater, don't flush it.

Governor George W. Bush, a front-runner for the Republican presidential nomination, had harsh words for the Web site www.gwbush.com. Saying "there ought to be limits to freedom," Bush has filed a legal complaint against the owners of the site that lampoons his White House bid.

As a potential presidential candidate, Mr. Bush has declined "to catalogue my youthful indiscretions". Such statements have led to general satirizing of the candidate with such clever quips as "Born with a silver spoon up his nose" or the Carvellian "It's the cocaine, stupid", a play on the two political slogans that led to his father's defeat in the 1992 presidential campaign.

The site also pokes fun at Mr. Bush's characterization of himself as a "compassionate conservative." "G.W. Bush has indeed been forgiven again and again by others. First there was his rambunctious youth, then as an unsuccessful Texas businessman, he was bailed out with millions of dollars from friends of his vice president father. As president, G.W. Bush wants to create an America in which everyone gets as much forgiveness and as many chances to grow up as he had", the site says.

Needless to say Bush campaign political consultant Karl Rove has purchased at least 60 domain names that include the Bush name in an apparent attempt to curtail other anti-Bush site-makers.

For more info on this story visit www.gwbush.com.

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets into ell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "…that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.